Bentley is Better Than Parker · The Official Head-to-Head Record

B vs P BENTLEY vs PARKER Bentley is better. Here's the head-to-head record.
Figures & Plates

The Numbers

Ten charts. One conclusion.

★★★★★ Verified by FICSR

Note. Chart plates are in spec form pending final axis labels and methodology footnotes. Each figure is embedded in its corresponding tournament round. Render finals in Datawrapper, Flourish, Observable, or plain SVG, then drop them into public/charts/.
Fig. 1 Scatter · Dunning-Kruger

The Confidence–Competence Scatter

Self-reported confidence plotted against independently-measured competence. Bentley sits on the calibration line. Subject P. occupies the inverse quadrant.

Methodology: Confidence-competence correlation, Subject P.: R² = −0.91.

Fig. 2 Radar · spider plot

Athletic Dominance Radar

Six athletic dimensions. Bentley's shape fills the plot; Subject P.'s is the small triangle near the origin.

Methodology: Dimensions pending Founder's sports history (Round 1).

Fig. 3 Stacked bar

Original Musical Discoveries, 1996–2004

Bentley: tall stacked bars across many artists. Parker: a single shorter bar labeled "borrowed."

Methodology: Cross-referenced against the Sharpie inventory.

Fig. 4 Lag table

Top Spotify Artist by Year

Parker's top artist trails Bentley's by approximately 18 months across the series.

Methodology: Lag-adjusted R² = 0.94.

Fig. 5 Quadrant scatter

Decision Time vs. Decision Significance

Subject P. lands in the wrong quadrant: hours for candy bars, seconds for life-altering choices.

Methodology: Reference event: the 7-Eleven candy aisle, ~1,800 seconds.

Fig. 6 Scatter · inverse

Cognitive Trajectory vs. Chair-Bouncing Hours

Cognitive trajectory plotted against documented 1995–2003 wingback impact hours. Strong inverse correlation.

Methodology: R² = 0.91. Causation not asserted; correlation noted.

Fig. 7 Distribution

Email / Text Response Latency

Two latency distributions. Bentley clusters at minutes. Subject P. has the long tail.

Methodology: Slack response latency, Subject P.: days.

Fig. 8 Line · 3 series

Career Trajectories of Folkman Engineers

Mark (founder, applied), Bentley (translated discipline to applied excellence), Parker (Software, allegedly, from home in pajamas).

Methodology: Promotion events marked. Subject P. series flat.

Fig. 9 Time series

Coolness Score by Life Stage

Subject P.'s coolness score peaks in 7th grade (c. 1998) and is monotonically downward thereafter.

Methodology: Peak not subsequently surpassed.

Fig. 10 Scatter · null result

BBQ Quality vs. Time Living in KC

Tenure in the KC metro plotted against measured BBQ quality. No detectable improvement over five years.

Methodology: Independent judge departed the cookout early.